I’d like you to take a moment and picture parenting as a radical act, a rebellion even, against the status quo, against the dim tedium of day to day life.
When most people think of parenting they don’t think about it in terms of cultural idealism.
Most people think of changing diapers, losing sleep, having your teenage daughter huff at you, groaning at the dinner table, getting into fights about cell-phone data usage, you know, the usual.
Let’s take a break from that for a second.
I’d like you to take a moment and picture parenting as a radical act, a rebellion even, against the status quo, against the dim tedium of day to day life.
‘Grimdark’ is a description for art & literature that is gritty, cynical, pessimistic, bleak, and generally hopeless; examples of grimdark include The Walking Dead, The Hurt Locker, The Witcher, most modern Batman movies (think Gotham City), etc...
We at Teen Brain Trust posit that the current attitude towards raising teenagers (at least in the US) is very grimdark.
When our kids are about to become teenagers we are warned by our friends, our own parents, social media, & the community at large just how difficult it will be. “Teenagers are so difficult, you’ll see,” is on everyone’s lips. When you tell people you have teenage kids they can’t wait to tell you just how sorry they are.
When’s the last time you said you had a teenager and someone said “wow that’s such a great age, you’re so lucky?”? I bet never!
‘Hopepunk’ defies grimdark. In a world that’s defined by cynicism, negativity, & resignation, choosing to have a positive and optimistic outlook is essentially an act of rebellion.
There’s a scientific reason why we believe in hopepunk parenting.
The adolescent brain does a major part of it’s learning through osmosis. That means that your teen is learning how to behave in the world by watching how other people behave in the world. Your kids are learning from watching YOU!
If your attitude about your kids is that it’s hard to parent them, that teens are a burden, are troublesome, make stupid decisions, whatever, then on some level, your kids will start to adopt that same attitude about themselves.
Belief is a powerful thing.
Belief is a powerful thing. This has been proven by a number of evidence-based studies.
If you want the best for your kids, choose to have a radically optimistic & hopeful view of who they are as people and what they’re going to do with their lives. Believe that their lives are full of wonder and opportunity; see the best in them, empathize with them, & support them.
Don’t buy into the BS grimdark narrative of what parenting teens is like.
Be a hopepunk parent instead, be recklessly optimistic, be rash, and carefree with how much you empower your kids.
Now you might be thinking to yourself, “easier said than done” and you’re right, but so what!?! Embracing hopepunk parenting isn’t easy, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth doing.
They’re teenagers, they’re basically walking miracles, and they deserve it. It’s science!
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